What Has God Been Teaching You?

At worship team practice Wednesday night, our worship pastor asked, "What has God been teaching you this week?" Well, funny thing. After Mom left Sunday with Loren, I was feeling a bit sorry for myself. Honestly, it hurts my feelings that my mom does not want to spend time with me. I know, I know, I've said this before; it is nothing new. It's just how I feel.

She needs me.
She thanks me for taking care of business for her.
She does really nice things for me, like willing my family her house.
But she doesn't especially like being with me.

And it is such a huge contrast when she is with Loren. She is delighted, happy, giddy. She smiles and smiles. She trusts him implicitly and his word is gold. It's not that I begrudge her happiness; I just wish that she could be happy with me too.

So, as I mentioned, I was a little bummed over the whole relationship situation. As I named my emotions and faced my feelings, God let me know He understood. And then He gently pointed out that often He feels that way too, because I treat Him the same way.

I need Him.
I thank Him for what He does for me.
I do nice things for Him and faithfully give.
But I don't especially like being with Him.
Bottom line, I don't delight myself in spending time with Him.

So, yeah, ouch. Nothing like examining a hurtful relationship and finding it a mirror. *sigh* The good news is that God doesn't give up. He keeps pursuing me even when I hurt his feelings. His love for me is so much better, so much finer, so much stronger than even my love for my mom. I could take a page from His book. And maybe I should do that!