Word #3

[More of Dave's sermon from Mom's service.]

Keep your vows with humility.

Tim Keller says, “Wedding vows are not a declaration of present love but a mutually binding promise of future love.”
What is love? 
Love is a sacrificial commitment to the good of another.

Our culture taints love with a consumer approach. We date. We put on our best face. We marry. We declare a love that will absolutely last unless one of us changes. That’s consumer love. Consumer love says, “I will love you until you gain weight, lose your job, get sick or lose your hair. At that point, I will find someone more suitable to my likes and dislikes. Or I will be bitter and make your life a living hell.”

However, wedding vows find greatest resonance in the concept of the biblical covenant. The Covenant love of a wedding vow is a mutually binding promise of future love. We need that kind of security. Both parties say, “I love you come what may.”

Covenant love is driven by the deep, inner quality of faithfulness. God’s great desire for marriages is that they are not necessarily happy or successful, but faithful. Faithful to a sacrificial commitment for the good of the other come what may. When that happens it is not us keeping the vow, but the vow keeping us.

Why is faithfulness in vows so important? Inherent to being human are these conditions:
If we are loved but not known, we find it superficial. You think I’m great because of my clothing, looks, job or money? That is shallow!
However, our greatest fear is to be known and not loved. That hurts. Reason we wear so many masks and hide behind ego and pride.
BUT: To be fully known and truly loved is the BEST. It is a lot like being loved by God. Such a love gives all of us hope—whether single or married. That is why God requires faithfulness in our relationships.

Ann realized the beauty of a covenant love. She recognized the need for humility. She readily admitted that “Egos die hard.”

Mike Mason says, “A vow is, per se, a confession of inadequacy and an automatic calling upon the only adequacy there is, which is the mercy and power of God. To keep a vow, therefore, means not to keep from breaking it, but rather to devote the rest of one’s life to discovering what the vow means, and to be willing go change and to grow accordingly” (p. 106).
It takes humility to change and grow accordingly. It takes an openness to the changes in our spouse and to God changing us.

Ann says: Keep your vows with humility. God will make you adequate with grace, mercy and strength. In these ways, it is the vow that then keeps us.

[One more to follow...]